There's beauty in the breakdown... ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Mi A Veces Sometimes I can hardly breathe when that purple light flashes. Other times, I don't want to see that light come. Sometimes I feel like sitting in a booth at the coffee shoppe alone for hours, just watching the world pass me by. Sometimes I dance like no one is watching even though I know that everyone is. Sometimes I listen to talk radio in my car and fight with the commentators...out loud. Sometimes I consider flying to Paris on a whim and losing myself in my favorite place. Sometimes I wish that I had married Justin so that I wouldn't be alone. Sometimes I think I am absolutely beautiful. Sometimes I drink apple juice out of a champagne flute just so I can pretend that I am elite and fabulous. Sometimes I tell him everything that is in my mind so that I don't give in to the fear. Sometimes I take it all back because the fear consumes me. Sometimes I paint my fingernails black just so people think I am a little off. And then I wear a cardigan sweater and diamond earrings with my black nails. Sometimes I get a good idea from another diarist, like this entry from Laura. Who told you love was fleeting?...Whatever you need to make you feel like you've been the one behind the wheel. The sunrise is just over that hill. The worst is over. ("A Gentlemen Caller" - Cursive) 8:23 PM - 03.07.04 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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